Mallrats

Here's something I thought of today, after watching my movie and thought I'd share.  If anyone out there has done this or something similar, let me know, cause it was awesome.

Mid 1990's, who didn't rollerblade?  All the rage, America was inline skating.  What was easy at college, what with the broad lanes of a Quad and stone steps and columns, was a little harder back in the suburbs.  Parks weren't really catering to rollerblades or skateboards, they were still verbotten.  So finding a nice surface was a premium.  One day, I had an idea...

At the local mall, they had a movie theater built indoors, like many malls across america.  Now the mall closes at 9, but the movie theater still shows until midnight or later.  When you exited the theater, you left through main theater doors.  Who has smoother, cleaner floors than the local mall?  No one, I daresay!

So, we scooted over one night, after the last movie started but before it ended, and bladed into the mall.  This was when we discovered, at least back then, that security only worked inside the mall during work hours.  At night, they just drove around the parking lot.

We proceeded to skate up and down the mall, from end to end, with absolutely NO ONE telling us to stop.  We passed cleaning crews that couldn't give a shit about us.  We raced, figure 8's, everything and anything we thought of.  No damage, nothing malicious, but we skated the shit out of that mall.

And then we left out the same doors we came in.  And then we did it again.  Memory's foggy, but I know we did it at least twice, possibly 3 times that summer.  Funnily, the only time we ran into issues with security was when we were skating in the parking lot itself.  One night, a security car chased us off, specifically for being in the parking lot, having nothing to do with the 1/2 hour we just spent inside the mall.

MotD: Observe and Report

Darkly funny movie about a Mall Cop with delusions of Grandeur.  If you're reading this and enjoyed Paul Blart: Mall Cop, close the browser and kill yourself.  That movie sucked such ass that it unfortunately tainted this much superior film's box office life.  There's problems with this film, some things about it feel a bit disjointed, but the performances are solid, there's some genuinely funny shit.  It feels like someone, studio or producers or some outside party, got their hands on it and twisted some things.  Nothing specific, if I had to guess which parts of the story were mucked with, I'm sure I'd be wrong, but it just veers from time to time from a consistent vision.  Having said that, it might be on purpose, since *** SPOILER ** the main character has bipolar issues.  Essentially putting the viewer through the same roller coaster that Seth Rogen is on. **END SPOILER**  Having said that, I liked this movie quite a bit and recommend it to anyone who can laugh at pain and enjoy watching damaged people bringing the crazy in a big bad way.